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    Categories: News

AWOL (Armenian Weekly On-Line), Volume 73, No. 3, January 20, 2007

The Armenian Weekly On-Line: AWOL
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Watertown MA 02472 USA
(617) 926-3974
armenianweekly@hairenik.com

http://www.a rmenianweekly.com

* * *

AWOL (Armenian Weekly On-Line), Volume 73, No. 3, January 20, 2007

1. Hrant Dink (1954-1915)
By Khatchig Mouradian

2. The Armenian Genocide and Our Faith in God
By George Aghjayan

3. Could ‘Musa Dagh’ Ever Hit the Video Game Screen?
By Andy Turpin

4. The Spokesman Speaks of Genocide-Old and New
By K.M.

5. ‘Tis a Far Better Thing I Do.’
Book Details One Armenian-Canadian’s Fight Against Fascism in Civil War
Spain
By Andy Turpin

6. New English-Language Paper in Turkey Hosts Well-Attended Debut Ceremony

7. Your Weekly Fix Of Poetry
Muted Message
By Tatul Sonentz

8. Winding Down Toward Retirement
By Tom Vartabedian

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1. Hrant Dink (1954-1915)
By Khatchig Mouradian

The above date, 1915, is not a typographical mistake.

On Saturday, April 24, 1915, Ottoman-Turkish soldiers arrested about 200
Armenian intellectuals-writers, journalists and community leaders-in
Istanbul, exiling them to the interior of the Ottoman Empire where they
would be killed. The plan was to behead the Armenian community by
annihilating its leadership and then to cleanse the entire population. The
day of the arrests marks the beginning of the Armenian Genocide.

On Friday, Jan. 19, 2007, also in Istanbul, another prominent Armenian
intellectual, Hrant Dink, was assassinated in front of the editorial offices
of his Armenian weekly newspaper Agos.

Hrant Dink is a victim of the Armenian Genocide.

And the Armenian Genocide continues.

Not only because denial is the last phase of Genocide.

But because the killing continues.

It was not an individual who killed Hrant Dink. So while Turkish authorities
are looking for a killer out loose in the streets, the real killer is the
Turkish state, which continues to foster a culture of violence,
assassinations, killings, oppression, and denial. The killer is the Turkish
state, which indoctrinates its citizens from an early age that the Armenian
Genocide is a myth, an agenda, pushed by the West to destroy Turkey.

"A bullet has been fired at democracy and freedom of expression," said
Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan. Yes, the bullet was Article 301
of the Turkish Penal Code, under which Dink was prosecuted.

The person who pulled the trigger was executing the will of the Turkish
state. Like his Prime Minister, government, army and the so-called
"Deep-State," he wanted to make the world believe that there was no Armenian
Genocide. Like Talaat Pasha, he believed that the Armenian question could be
solved by killing those who made demands.

We shall remember you, Hrant, together with Varoujan and Siamanto and all
the victims of the Armenian Genocide.
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—-

2. The Armenian Genocide and Our Faith in God
By George Aghjayan

"In my young mind I kept asking myself why we had been born Armenians, and
why our God and Jesus Christ were apparently unprotective and less powerful
than the so-almighty Allah and Prophet Mohammed of the Turks." (Rebirth: The
Story of an Armenian girl who survived the Genocide and found Rebirth in
America by Elise Hagopian Taft.)

"Only God in heaven, who looked down upon that pitiful death march, and
permitted it, we are sure, for some good purpose, knows how far we walked."
(Exiled: Story of an Armenian Girl by Serpohi Tavoukdjian.)

"Yeran had learned now the hard lesson that life without faith and hope is
meaningless, and that courage is one of the most important virtues of
mankind." (Destined to Survive by Negdar K. Tabibian.)

Faith in God is a frequent theme contained in the accounts of Armenian
Genocide survivors. However, I find very little written on the subject of
the existence of an all-powerful, benevolent God and evil of the magnitude
manifested in the Armenian Genocide. This is particularly surprising given
the strong adherence of the Armenian people to Christianity.

Theodicy, as defined in Wikipedia [The biggest multilingual encyclopedia on
the Internet], is a specific branch of theology and philosophy that attempts
to reconcile the existence of evil in the world with the assumption of a
benevolent God, i.e. the problem of evil. It is not my aim here to recount
the enormous literature on the subject of theodicy, but instead to discuss
some points of interest from the perspective of Armenians.

On the surface, it might seem amazing that Armenians would retain any faith
in an all-powerful, benevolent God after witnessing the horrors of the
Genocide. Many did lose their faith, but one can also understand how
surviving would lead to a renewal or strengthening of faith. Those being
subjected daily to the horrors of the Genocide continually prayed to God for
deliverance-thus, the ultimate deliverance would serve as justification for
not having lost faith.

Given how miraculous it was that any survived, one could also reason that it
was the intervention of God that led to their survival. It follows that God
must have had a purpose for them in life that was for others in death. I am
sure this view weighed heavily on the minds of survivors. The dedication of
many in the Armenian community to this day, whether in the religious,
political or cultural sphere, can probably be traced to a sense of
responsibility to God and those that perished.

While my own commitment probably stems in large part to the responsibility I
feel towards those in my family that suffered and survived, I still reject
the notion that those who suffered unspeakable horrors did so for some
higher purpose. More specifically, that such a plan would be so detailed as
to pick one person over another.

Some survivors attributed survival to their purity of heart and actions. I,
personally, have trouble accepting this line of reasoning which sniffs of a
"holier than thou" attitude. Those that survived were not somehow more
worthy than those that perished.

Perhaps a more honest assessment is given by those survivors that believed
they would have perished if not for the hope that faith supplied. Once all
hope was lost, the will to survive and ultimately the person would die.

Mental strength, physical strength, luck, hope and faith were all needed to
survive the Armenian Genocide. But none of this really addresses the
question of how evil can exist. How can those who profess a Christian belief
suffer while those who denounce Jesus Christ be rewarded?

I have read many unsatisfactory answers to this question and maybe there
cannot be a truly fulfilling one in this age of reasoning. For me, the only
perspective I can draw upon is the view of God as a parent who must allow
his children to make mistakes in the process of maturing. Mankind is still
in its infancy. Hopefully, as we mature, we will outgrow the evil of our
childhood.

To do so will require a strong faith in God and a commitment to live good
lives.
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—-
3. Could ‘Musa Dagh’ Ever Hit the Video Game Screen?
By Andy Turpin

Video games are not what they used to be.

That statement is both nostalgic and loaded. It may seem infantile to ponder
the future of video games when there are so many crucial real-world issues
today to worry about that haven’t upped American tension levels this much
since the Cuban Missile Crisis. But for the teenager beside you, all the
would-be Orwellian fates in the world aren’t as important as the video game
title releases on their calendar.

In no way are these sentiments a blessing to any parent or adult, but one
should be abreast of where video games are headed-not to stop the train per
se, but to have some control and say in the content.

Video games are more realistic and cinematic than ever before; their
die-hard creators are now highly educated and well-read individuals with
just as much eye for detail and accuracy as lust for gore.

And the people, not just the children, are riveted. Video games are becoming
celluloid reality. Note last year’s film release of "Crank," an obvious
staging of the "Grand Theft Auto" video game series, and the film version of
the classic video game "Doom," which surprised many with its didactic plot,
related in its deconstruction of evil to Christopher R. Browning’s 1992 book
Ordinary Men.

In an age where journalism and publishing industry jobs have become ivory
tower ranks, more young writers are turning in their pens and keyboards, and
scripting video games instead.

History and cult audiences are big business in this industry when you look
at the success of games like the "Call of Duty" series, which lets people
fight the Battle of Stalingrad as a Communist soldier, or the much
anticipated release this year of the game "Civil War: A Nation Divided" by
the History Channel and Activision.

Now, whether parents will admit it or not, there is a trend of apathy among
Armenian youth when it comes to political issues. Perhaps not quite at the
gut wrenching level that exists among American youth, but it’s alarming
enough for a people that have always made their voice heard. I’m not
advocating for teens to play video games instead of being involved in
activism or writing their Congressmen, but if they’re going to spend their
time at the game console, why not "hit them where they live" with politics,
as well.

A large budget film version of Franz Werfel’s "The Forty Days at Musa Dagh"
is currently in the works by producer Sylvester Stallone. It’s much needed;
but to play devil’s advocate, how much more would a historically accurate
and interactive game version of the battle resonate with people?

Of course, the rub would be to create the game in such a manner that it
detailed the form of the resistance and didn’t trivialize the Genocide
itself. But didactic games have been created successfully about the French
resisting the German Vichy government in Steven Spielberg’s "Medal of Honor"
series, and they’ve even cornered the market on a yet unfought future war to
liberate North Korea in Lucasart’s "Mercenaries." In both games, the
dynamics between war and genocide are either touched upon just enough to be
valuable learning tools, or skirted around just enough to be politically
correct-depending on which side of the parental fence you stand on.

It isn’t possible to de-program the nature of evil from humanity. But it may
be a question of "when" and not "if’ you’ll get to create a 3D working image
of your fedayi great-grandfather on screen.
—————————————— ———————————-

4. The Spokesman Speaks of Genocide-Old and New
By K.M.

WATERTOWN, Mass. (A.W.)-Issue number 93 of the Spokesman, a publication of
the Bertrand Russell Peace Foundation based in England, deals with the theme
of genocides-old and new. Among the featured articles are "Genocide" by
Raphael Lemkin, first published in 1946, and "The First Holocaust," the
chapter on the Armenian Genocide from Robert Fisk’s recent book The Great
War for Civilization. (For a complete list of the articles or for more
information on the Bertrand Russell Foundation, visit
and )

In "Genocide," Lemkin, the Polish-Jew who coined the term "genocide," talks
about the "mass obliteration of nationhoods" throughout Nazi occupied
Europe, noting that although the Nazi experience is "the most striking,"
there are other examples: "The destruction of Carthage; that of religious
groups in the wars of Islam and the Crusades; the massacres of Albigenses
and Waldenses; and more recently, the massacre of the Armenians." Arguing
that mass murder is not an adequate name for such phenomena, Lemkin says he
felt the need to coin a new term: genocide. "This word is made from the
ancient Greek word genos (race clan) and the latin suffix cide (killing),"
he explains. The rest, as they say, is history.

"But why have we chosen a chapter on the Armenian genocide to represent this
great book here, when it is also alive with reports of contemporary traumas,
in Afghanistan or Lebanon, Iraq, Iran, or Algeria?" asks Spokesman editor
Ken Coates in his editorial, referring to Fisk’s book.

"There have been, in short, innumerable cruelties in the conquest of the
Middle East, but in one sense the most shocking thing about these often
criminal acts is that the screams of their victims have so frequently gone
unheard. The great warriors who have sought to impose their own mean
civilization on peoples whose culture is as old as time, have also imposed
selective hearing, discriminate memory. A celebration of happy
indifference," Coates continues.

"Fisk has unerringly homed in on the Armenian massacres as a classic symbol
of these responses. with his help, we can try to count the dead. But far
more significantly, we can begin to understand the vital necessity of memory
in defending the humanity of its victims," concludes Coates.

During his 30 years as news correspondent in the Middle East, Fisk
interviewed many survivors of the Armenian Genocide and visited death sites
like Der Zor and Margada. He also acquired many British private papers
discussing the Genocide. In "The First Holocaust," Fisk masterfully narrates
the horrors of the first genocide of the 20th century through survivor
accounts, reports of foreign diplomats, documents unearthed by historians,
and the press. Serpouhi Papazian is one of the survivors he interviews.
"Ten years after the Armenian Holocaust, Serpouhi returned to the hill at
Margada to try to find the remains of her father and sister. ‘All I found in
1925 were heaps of bones and skulls she said. They had been eaten by wild
animals and dogs. I don’t even know why you bother to come here with your
notebook and take down what I say.’"

Because the truth must be told, and justice must be served.
—————————————— ———————————-
—–
5. ‘Tis a Far Better Thing I Do.’
Book Details One Armenian-Canadian’s Fight Against Fascism in Civil War
Spain
By Andy Turpin

Now is a time of reckoning in world politics. Genocide recognition is
gaining international momentum, nuclear ambition tides are rising, and
hybrid indigenous Catholic-Communism is taking hold in South America-all in
the shadow of the U.S.-Iraq quagmire and a powder keg of death and
displacement in Africa.

Thus perhaps more than ever, the veterans who fought against the Fascist
forces in the Spanish Civil War need to be remembered, for their heroism and
foresight into the monster that would soon become World War II.

Coupled with a sizeable number of vigilant Jews, some of the resistance
fighters were Armenian. The story of one such Armenian, Pat Stephens, is
recounted in the book A Memoir of the Spanish Civil War: An
Armenian-Canadian in the Lincoln Battalion, published by the Canadian
Committee on Labor History in 2000, 13 years after Stephens’ death. The book
details his military career as a Republican-Communist soldier in Spain from
1936 to 1939, with Franco’s defeat of the resistance. Richard Rennie,
professor of history at the Memorial University of Newfoundland, wrote the
introduction, detailing Stephens’ family background. "Stephens was born in
Armenia on 22 November 1910. His given name was Badrig der Stepanian, and he
was the fourth of five boys born to Esther Bedrossian and Solomon der
Stephanian. .Stephen’s father and his uncle, Mugerditch, were active in
local politics, and early in the war [WWI] Mugerditch was taken away and
executed. Stephen’s father narrowly escaped the same fate, but died shortly
after."

In 1921, Stephens and his family left Armenia and moved to Syria and then to
Windsor, Ontario. Prior to the outbreak of the war in Spain, Stephens
foraged his way through the Depression by working any job, no matter how
minute. Just before the stock market crash of 1929, he started working as an
accountant with General Motors, and was able to bring his mother to Detroit,
though she died the same year. Stephens lost his job soon after to massive
layoffs and was forced to return to Canada. In Toronto, he picked up jobs
selling refrigerators and electric signs, or working in restaurants. It was
at this point that he joined the Canadian Communist party-which is
noteworthy, because many of the volunteer fighters who went to Spain did so
assuaging their reservations against Communism to work towards the greater
good of combating Fascism.

Stephens volunteered to fight alongside the International Brigades in Dec.
1936 and arrived in Spain in Feb. 1937. "As such, he was one of those
approximately 500 Canadians who went to Spain before the promulgation of the
Foreign Enlistment Act in July 1937," writes Rennie. Stephens was first a
machine gunner, then Chief of Intendencia and later a military investigator.
He was older and more literate than many of his counterparts, and advanced
quickly through the rank and file troops.

To take his account at face value, one would gauge that part of this
advancement was due to the amount of nurturing care and competence he showed
the men under his command. One example is when he notes, "I noticed someone
I knew," wrote Stevens in his accounts. "An Armenian-American from
Worcester, Mass. This man was one of the worst bitchers in the Battalion. I
was always trying to cheer him up and bolster his morale whenever we got
together. I told him as soon as we got to Alvarez, I would buy a lamb and
prepare a nice meal for some of our boys."

The fact that he was Armenian most likely played a part in the internal
politics and relations of his unit. Every organization has its own system of
advancement, favoritism and nepotism. Within the International Brigades, it
was an asset to be Armenian, Jewish, Italian, Basque or Greek, as these were
all tightly knit cultures that had a vested interest in defeating Fascist
and genocidal enemies. Thus, degrees of ethnic solidarity existed next to
genuine fraternal and Communal values.

Stephens notes that being Armenian helped him secure his machine gunner
position. "I put in a request to be transferred to the machine gun company,
which was regarded as the elite of the Battalion," he wrote. "I asked
Comrade Sahagian, who was in charge of the ammunition detail, and he said he
would speak to Comrade Davidian, who was in charge of the machine gun
company. Davidian was also an Armenian, like myself and Sahagian. .He told
me to get my gear together. Then he took me to Number One machine gun
section and I became a member of that group. Soon I was taught how to take
the machine gun apart, clean it, and put it together again. I was also shown
how to shoot it. Our guns were all World War I relics, but they worked."

Those in the International Brigades, like those in the French Foreign
Legion, joined for any number of political reasons, which created an even
more diverse and resourceful body of men and indeed women, as well. Jews
joined to fight German influence in Spain and anti-Semitism; Basques fought
to preserve their communities, which were under smaller attacks, such as
that on Guerica by Nazis forces assisting Franco in 1937); and many Irish
volunteered to flee terrorist arrest warrants issued by the British
authorities.

Stephens mentions one such man who later became a turncoat both to the
Communist party, the British Empire, and the Spanish Republicans he fought
beside. "Another top IRA man was Frank Ryan. He had played a leading role in
the Irish uprisings [Easter, 1916]. . Frank Ryan was eventually captured.
Because of his connections to the IRA, he was not executed. He was shifted
from Spain to Berlin and placed at the disposal of the Germans. Even then
the Germans had plans to use Ryan for their purposes against Britain. I
don’t know what happened to him in Berlin, but he’s buried there."

Such acute memories of the various personalities he encountered in Spain are
historically important, as they illustrate that seeds of distrust and
duplicity existed alongside palates of patriotic and ideological loyalty.
Similar to many accounts of the First World War, Stephens writes that the
Spanish Civil War was in many ways a trench war; as such, soldiers endured
many of the same hardships their brethren faced on the earlier fronts of
Gallipoli and the Somme. Stephens had a front row seat to history while in
Spain, and an unabashed preview of the carnage that would follow on its
heels when the Wiermacht marched across Europe.

He wrote of the "lousy" conditions of everyday life, including how he and
his men coped with outbreaks of dysentery throughout the camp. "The more
serious cases were sent to hospitals in the rear. It was strange that the
native Spaniards were not affected at all. One day I asked the commander of
the Spanish contingent why the Spanish comrades were not affected by these
outbreaks. He took me to his dugout and showed me the strings of garlic
hanging on the walls. He said they ate some every day and never got sick.
Soon our entire battalion was eating raw garlic."

Stephens had the ability to speak plainly about those he met, including
Ernest Hemingway, who is often romanticized, to say the least. Stephens met
Hemingway and spoke of their encounter, saying, "We went to Madrid in a
truck and arrived there before noon. Our group was to stay at the Florida
Hotel, where a kitchen had been arranged for the American boys. A few tables
away from us sat Ernest Hemingway, and Herbert Matthews of the New York
Times. . These reporters never lacked the comforts of life. The discussion
took the form of a press conference. They wanted to know if we had
experienced hand-to-hand combat with the enemy, how the food was at the
front, whether we regretted volunteering, and so on. None of these men
really impressed me, not even Hemingway. They were cold and impersonal, and
seemed not to care much what happened in Spain, or for that matter in the
world."

At one point Stephens mildly probes Hemingway to gauge his genuine combat
experience. "I asked Hemingway how our war compared with his experience in
Italy during the war [WWI]. He replied that he couldn’t really answer that
because he really hadn’t been away from Madrid long enough to formulate an
opinion. He said, however, that from what he had seen in Madrid and his
visits with Spanish units at the front, the Spanish war seemed to be a more
cruel war."

The culmination of Stephens’ Spanish Civil War experience, like the
correlating experiences of other International Brigade volunteers, is
bittersweet. Similar to the Hungarian anti-Soviet uprising that would occur
in 1956, much of the world had their eye on Spain, but officially their
hands stayed at their sides and erred on the side of caution when it came to
intervention.

After the defeat of the International Brigades and the solidification of the
Franco government, volunteers were sent home. What added insult to injury
for these brave men and women was the fact that their own governments
treated them with suspicion and distain because they had directly
collaborated with the regime of Stalin, who footed the armament’s bill to
the International Brigades during their campaign.

Stephens’ ends his memoir disheartened and disillusioned by the apathy of
the world. He tells of his journey home to Canada. "We traveled in locked
cars to the Port of Dieppe, and there we were met at the station by a
contingent of the French Guard Mobile, to make sure that none of us escaped
into France itself. . We had to wait a few hours until the tide came in, and
then we started for England. In a few hours, we docked at Newhaven, and were
on English soil again. We read the giant headlines on the local newspapers,
‘Barcelona Fallen to Franco.’ That was the end of my romantic attempt to
make the world safe for democracy."

A Memoir of the Spanish Civil War stands today as a testament to a bygone
era in democratic history, and a milestone-perhaps under researched-chapter
in Diasporan Armenian history. It represents yet another window into the
minds of the younger Genocide survivors and of the immediate offspring of
the older ones.

Stephens’ memories may hold fast today as a standard to combat political
apathy among the present generation of young Armenians, even if at times it
reveals itself as evidence of the Sicilian proverb, "No good deed goes
unpunished."

I prefer to see it as a manifestation of kith and kin to the words uttered
both by Socrates and Thomas Paine: "I am neither an Athenian, nor a Greek,
but a Citizen of the World."
————————————- —————————————

6. New English-Language Paper in Turkey Hosts Well-Attended Debut Ceremony

WATERTOWN, Mass. (A.W.)-On Jan. 15, the Turkish government stars were out in
the sky to roll out the welcome kilim for the debut ceremony honoring the
establishment of Turkey’s third English-language daily newspaper, Today’s
Zaman.

In attendance at the ceremony, held at the Ankara Sheraton, were Turkish
Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan, foreign minister Abdullah Gul, state
minister and chief EU negotiator Ali Babacan, education minister Huseyin
Celik, energy and natural resources minister Hilmi Guler, and state minister
Kurshad Tuzmen.

In its coverage of the event, Today’s Zaman noted that Gul’s "excitement
could be seen in his eyes"-so much so that the paper recorded it twice.

Expectations for the new paper ran high as Erdogan expressed that "Plurality
in the media is of great importance in a democratic society." He continued
by saying, "Today’s Zaman will increase the richness and diversity of the
Turkish media. Such a strong publication, with a substantial content, will
add strength to the attempts carried out to promote Turkey in the world. It
will be a window for diplomats who closely follow Turkey as well as foreign
public opinion. I see this in Today’s Zaman. Turkey has experienced a
dramatic image revolution in the last four years. Yet, it is evident that we
have a problem concerning effective promotion of our country in the world.
We better understand it from the prejudices of other nations towards Turkey.
Despite the efforts, we will ask, ‘Are we still there?’ With its principled
and constructive publication, Today’s Zaman will contribute to the promotion
of Turkey, the Turkish nation and to overcoming the biases and cliches about
Turkey."

Gul spoke before Erdogan took the stage and praised the paper’s release. "We
will do our best to support this endeavor," he said. "I see the rise in the
number of papers published in English in Turkey to three as a signal of
Turkey’s importance and greatness. Foreign politicians and economic circles
are following what is going on in Turkey. Our country became worthy of being
followed. Rest assured that you will achieve a high volume of circulation.
You will be followed with interest, and sometimes you will be quoted by
others."

Ekrem Dumanli, and editor-in-chief of the Zaman Daily, the Turkish-language
counterpart of Today’s Zaman, gave special thanks to Erdogan for his support
of Turkish journalism, particularly on the occasion of the Daily’s 15th
anniversary on Nov. 3, 2001. Dumanli was heavily involved in attempting to
gain journalistic respectability for Turkish papers. "We invited a number of
guests to our anniversary six years ago," he recalled. "Some did not show up
despite our insistence. We felt resentment back then because we did not
expect special favors from anybody. All we wanted was emotional support for
the paper. I would like to offer a special thank you to a very special
person who attended that meeting and gave an eloquent address. That day he
was excited about the founding of a new political party; today, he
administers this beautiful country. I would like to thank our Prime Minister
Recep Tayyip Erdogan, who is honored this evening."

Today’s Zaman own editor-in-chief, Bulent Kenes, set community-oriented
goals for the fledgling paper, stating that "Today’s Zaman, determined to
convey Turkey’s realities to the international stage, was designed to
reflect all colors of life, and not as a publication only with columns and a
diplomatic content."

Saudi Arabia’s ambassador to Turkey, Muhammad R Al-Hussaini, lauded the
paper similarly. when he commented, "Now we will have three papers, each
with a different perspective. I believe Today’s Zaman will be more
successful than the others. What will distinguish it is its transparency and
integrity. Hopefully its news will meet the demands of the individuals as
well as the envoys. First thing first, I will buy the paper. I will be a
regular reader." Turkey’s other two English-language papers are The Turkish
Daily News and The New Anatolian.

Various new agencies expressed interest in the paper’s launch, including the
Chinese news agency Xinhua, the Lebanese communication group Al-Manhar TV,
and the IRNA official Iranian news network. European or American news
agencies did not attend the ceremony.

Today’s Zaman can be accessed online by visiting www.todays zaman.com.
————————————— ————————————-
———— —–

7. Your Weekly Fix Of Poetry
MUTED MESSAGE

First snow of the year
life is muffled like the sounds
made by a string ensemble
playing to frozen eardrums
out of sight out of reach to those
stranded in the lone recesses
of a receding lifeline.
Nothing can speak louder
or freeze colder than silence.
no curse emoted or whispered
can cause the pain that silence can
without emitting a word without
being here – where once a song
of a shared passion steamed
the windowpanes of this place
where I now reside alone
dismissed sheltered
yet. homeless
With the meandering flakes
silence descends like a shroud
on the love that was my home
for what seemed like eternity
uninterrupted – it seemed –
from lullaby to taps.
First snow of the year
desires are muted now like
murmured prayers to gods
long departed.

Tatul Sonentz
Dec. 2001
——————————————— —————–

8. Winding Down Toward Retirement
By Tom Vartabedian

Had I known my retirement from the newspaper industry would create this much
of a stir, I probably would have been more discreet about it.

I’ve always shyed away from such attention, preferring a more secluded
lifestyle. Of course, that didn’t prevent me from attending other people’s
retirements and wishing them well.

Actually, if you want to know the truth, I’ve been retired ever since I
started with the Gazette 40 years ago. I’ve never considered my work a job
but more of an enjoyable recreation that quenched my thirst for writing and
introduced me to many fine friends both inside and outside the media.

I remember one time sitting in the dugout of a high school baseball game
with a scorebook in my hand, puffing away on my pipe with my feet extended
on the bench. The weather was warm and I was soaking in the sun.

"That’s my kind of a job," a player remarked. "You actually get paid for
doing this?"

"Tough work, but somebody’s got to do it," I joked.

What the boy didn’t realize was that the real work was yet to come. That

meant figuring out the box score and writing a story that was positive, even
if the score was lopsided.

So when does a man with a lifetime profession retire? Well, it’s time. Four
decades of deadlines was actually the easy part. I was never one to buckle
under pressure, even if it meant being six feet under water without a
snorkel. The creative part was just as much fun. The challenge came in
finding the good stories. For that, you have to play detective.

The big concern toward retirement is how to spend a lot of time doing what
you might enjoy without spending a lot of cash.

"You could always volunteer," a working colleague told me. "Or you can spend
your days at the senior center playing pool and going on trips."

What I don’t want to be is "chairman of the bored." Since word got out about
my retirement, I’ve been invited to join four service clubs in the
community, three bank boards, two planning committees and an offer to hike
the Appalachian Trail.

The hiking part is out of the question, unless I want to spend six months
trudging across 2,100 miles of rough terrain.

Truthfully, I wanted to cash in before it was too late. I’ve seen too many
who were besieged by medical problems and couldn’t enjoy their golden years.
My father died at 66-the year he was thinking about leaving the restaurant
business. My brother succumbed at 54 while still employed. He never got the
benefit of a happy retirement.

A good time to retire is before it’s too late to enjoy the rewards.

I see the friendly folks at my local YMCA fitness center and they’ve

struck up a worthwhile routine. They spend their mornings exercising for
themselves and the afternoons exercising for their wives.

"She gives me a honey-do list," said one chap. "Honey do this. Honey do
that. After awhile, you may want to become re-employed."

Others agree that once I’m retired and get into the flow, I’ll begin to
wonder how I ever found the time to hold down a job. The fact I was able to
survive this long at one job was another miracle, considering the changes
and the takeovers over my tenure. Just an educated guess, I’ve worked for
more than 100 editors over that span and none are around today to bid me
farewell.

People are asking me what my last story will be. I remember the first. It
turned out to be an obituary after I was hired as a sportswriter. I took
offense to that.

"Son," my editor said. "When you work for a community paper, you do it
all-sports, obits, politics, police, school and society. Nobody
specializes around here."

If anything, it’s taught me to be a better craftsman at

my art, certainly more versatile and all the more oriented to my profession.

My wife retired from the teaching profession two years ago. At the time, she
encouraged me to continue doing what I loved. I owe this retirement to her,
my children and a 95-year-old mom inside a nursing home that welcomes the
attention.

Most of all, I owe it to myself. We are often the architects of our own
destiny and selfish as it may sound, we should often put ourselves first. No
one else can dictate your pleasure.

With two weeks remaining, the last story has yet to be written, much less
determined. But I’ll tell you this much. I hope it’s a story that will do
some good for somebody because that’s what newspapers should be all about.
I’ve always tried to be a good news type, even when I was called upon to be
a critic.

As the days wind down to a precious few, I have one last thought about my
imminent retirement-and that’s a disadvantage. Now I’ll be forced to drink
coffee on my own time.

***
(c) 2006 Armenian Weekly On-Line. All Rights Reserved.

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